TOP QUESTIONS OR CONCERNS REGARDING ATHLETICS:

1)       I AM UPSET WITH MY KID’S COACH BUT FEAR A CONVERSATION MIGHT RESULT IN HIM RESENTING MY KID.  WHAT CAN I DO?

A) Academic difficulties… you wouldn’t hesitate to talk to teacher.  If your child experiences arm  pain long after a doctor visit…. Would you not schedule a return appointment?

B) The concern that the coach will retaliate against your child shouldn’t enter your mind. But keep in mind that like other people, coaches usually will become defensive when attacked. 

C) With out a doubt call the coach and arrange a time to chat face to face.  Be sure that you’re seeking answers  to questions that will ultimately enhance your child’s sport experience.  (don’t use e-mail)

D) Be prepared to hear someone with a different perspective express objective opinions about your child.

2)       My child’s coach yells at the players, is that necessary?

A) In addition to different coaching styles…there are obviously personalities differences among coaches as well….

B) Listen to the content of what is being yelled….

C) Some coaches have personalities that are likely louder than the more soft spoken coach.  Certainly you are not offended if the coach is yelling encouragement or praise towards your child. 

D) On sports teams there is usually an understanding between coach and player that the intent of all communication is improvement.  Players usually handle constructive criticism very well whatever the tone.

E)  Coaching is much like parenting…children know the intent of mom and dad’s manner of communication and filter the tone or volume.  The same is likely with the coach. 

F)  The key lies in the intent…coaches should never be demeaning… if you feel this is the case you need to schedule a meeting with the coach.

3)       What can I do when the high school coach plays my son in a position not suited for him?

A) If you feel strongly about the position you child is in then you need to encourage your child to talk with the coach about the matter.  The issue should be discussed between player and coach!  Keep in mind that most parents look at the team through biased eyes.  Our coaches will attempt to put the best people in a line-up that enhances the competitiveness of the team. 

B) Sometimes a player with good skills in a sport will be played out of position to allow a position-specific skilled player to be in the line-up.

4)       How can I expect leadership skills to be developed in child when they are never given the opportunity to be a captain!

A) There are two types of leaders…. The first is assigned leadership…. That which is appointed.  Secondly, leadership is attained through attitude and accomplishment.

B) If your child has never been appointed as a leader there are still ample opportunities to develop leadership skills,   Leadership can be earned through such qualities as courage, accomplishment, inspirational abilities, and how you treat others…Real leadership is earned….not appointed.

5)       Why does my child get punished twice by the school and athletically…

A) Every public school student is entitled to educational opportunities.  It is a right!

B) Participating in the extracurricular activities..ie. athletics is not a right…but a privilege.  Students who engage in sports are made aware that they represent our school in an ambassadorship role.  They are not just another student…. There is a well published code of conduct… when one of the ambassadors violates the code of conduct…. There will always be a consequence for their choice…. If they are guilty of the infraction then there should be no question as to the reaction/consequence. 

6)       Isn’t a family outing or vacation an acceptable excuse for a child to miss practice or games.

A) A case can be made for this scenario for the younger levels...... middle school etc..

B) This mentality needs to change as the sports become more serious and committed….

C) Remember….for most teams there are tryouts…. A selection process… naturally some members don’t make the team….It is difficult for us to justify allowing a member to take a vacation from their commitment when others were cut from the team… and the rest of the team stays the course.

D) If a number of families decided to take vacations in the middle of a sports season, we would have a total collapse of programs.  One critical lesson in sport is that of commitment.

7)      80% of the parents that communicate with me regarding a concern directly involving their child say…. I don’t want my child or the coach knowing that I am meeting with you.

A) A meeting of this nature does not promote solutions…. We have found that in order to reach a mutually satisfying resolution both sides need to meet face to face.

B) These kids are young adults and as a part of educational athletics one of our goals is to teach and encourage children the skills of mature conflict resolution.   We would like the athlete to address concerns that they have with their coach.

C) Before intervening on behalf of your child you need to ask your self if this your concern or your child’s.

8)      Underage drinking and how and when will we consequence an individual for drinking.

A) First of all, underage drinking is a problem not just in Richmond… it is a society problem…. But we can’t let that be an excuse to turn a blind eye or enable kids to do so…. It is against the law! 

B) We do not govern on rumors…you’d be surprised at how many anonymous letters or phone calls we get a week snitching on kids… We govern or issue consequences based on facts… the infraction is brought to us by….police, staff member witnesses, self-admittance, or a board member witnesses……

C) Again, we don’t hand out consequences based on rumors…but we have an obligation to investigate any creditable witness or rumor.

Have you ever witnessed a high school graduation exercise where a lone rose lay on an unoccupied chair signifying a lost life?  Often is a story of teen alcohol usage. 

We need to be proactive and do our part for society…. It is not about snitching on kids to get them in trouble; it is about giving youngsters help in avoiding heartbreak and tragedy.  You have the information about the activities of these young people.  Ask yourself this…if you do nothing about it and there is an accident resulting in injury or death to these youngsters, how will you feel?  This is not a game…. This is about life!!!